The Ground Rules Of Co-Parenting By Mary Gee

Peaceful and successful co-parenting is not always possible in every divorce situation, but it is certainly something that everyone in this position should attempt to make work for the sake of their children.

Your aim in co-parenting is to produce fairly well-adjusted children who know that they are free to love both parents equally, and that they are loved in return regardless of the domestic set up at home.

After all, studies have shown that children who are confident that they are loved at home fare better in the outside world, do not have as many discipline problems and do far better academically.

If at all possible try and arrange for the two of you to sit down and talk and agree to work together to co-parent the children and set some ground rules. This will help matters with the children to run more smoothly. If that is not possible, then try to abide by the rules yourself and hope that your ex will see the sense of taking a measured and non-confrontational approach to parenting your children.

Some basic co-parenting guidelines: The adults must function as adults - A problem between the parents should remain with the parents.

The children must be allowed to be children - The child should not be worried about paying the bills, or whether or not daddy is paying child support.

Discipline styles and rules are up to the individual - you run different homes with different rules. For the most part try to keep it consistent in both homes, but there will always be some personal preferences that differ. Show the children that you respect that things are different in the other household and that you expect them to abide by rules, whatever they are, wherever they are.

Major decisions need to be made by all parties - major being something that will have serious impact on the rest of their lives. Kids always come first - Getting revenge on each other only hurts the kids. Yelling and fighting with one another only hurts the kids. Bringing up the past only hurts the kids. Keep these things to yourself at all times. Communication is crucial - This is going to be difficult, and the closer you are to the divorce the more difficult it will be. In the beginning it is best to keep conversations short, and end them quickly if tension is building.

Whatever you do, don't use the kids to communicate for you. That isn't how adults handle problems, and that isn't allowing the child to just be a child. Well no-one said it was going to be easy, but for the sake of your children and their future happiness you will need to grit your teeth, bite your tongue and keep smiling! Good Luck!

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Mary_Gee

How Parents Can Teach Their Children To Swim By Del Shante

Teaching someone in your family how to swim is similar to helping someone learn how to drive. There are risks involved and the process requires a lot of patience and support.

Once you have located a venue near your home for the swimming lessons you will need to buy a swimsuit and a kickboard.

Using a kickboard will help your child get used to moving in the water using their legs. First have them practice holding onto the side and check that they have the correct technique. After they have mastered the movements of their legs you can hold them under their armpits and give them the opportunity to kick without using the wall for support. Once they have enough confidence, walk them out into the shallow area of the pool and allow them to attempt swimming, with your supervision, using the kickboard.

Once they are able to swim using the kickboard it is time to move up to the next level. This involves them learning to swim using their arms. To give them an idea of what they are expected to do, first give them a demonstration. Show them how they should use their arms whilst kicking with their legs. They aren't going to be able to do this by themselves so support them by placing your arms beneath their stomach, keeping them afloat.

This level will take longer to complete and will require your child gaining enough skill and confidence to attempt a short swim, alone. Be sure to accompany them and offer them plenty of praise and positive reinforcement. If they have a fright it may take them a while to build up their trust and confidence again so go slowly and try not to push them too hard into doing something they are not ready for or comfortable doing.

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Parent's Guide to Raising a Good Child By Katherine E Thompson

Because the world today has become harsh, it is important for parents to have some basic principles that will serve as their guide in raising their kids. According to Noel Swanson's eBook entitled The Good Child Guide, there are a number of crucial concepts that will help parents raise happy and kind children. To summarize the parenting tips that the Good Child Guide eBook detailed, here are the top 3 essential principles that will most effectively assist parents according to the Good Child Guide Review.

1. Give Regular Praise and Compliments

According to the book, parents should always remember to provide their kids with regular praise and compliments. However, praises should only be done in moderation and giving super-praises are discouraged in order to avoid pressure. When you praise your child, you introduce important values to your kids as you set expectations for them. Through compliments, you let your children know that you believe in them.

2. Take Charge but Avoid Power Struggles

Getting into a power struggle with your child is the worse thing that you can do. Although you need to take charge of your kids, make sure that you do not give them the idea that you are "overpowering" them. Children need strong leadership from you and they require limits to feel secure as well. When your kids are still young, they are in no shape to decide or to think for themselves so you give them boundaries while you guide them what is right from wrong. But as they grow older, give them more choices, more freedom, but more responsibilities as well.

Always be careful not to let your children think that they have power over you. If they are given too many early choices and freedom too early, they will learn to resent the rules and responsibilities. So make sure that you have a firm grip on your children and let them know that you are in charge.

3. Be the Role Model

Like how child experts put it, children are like mirrors. They will follow whatever the people around them does, and because you are the parent, that puts you on top of the list.

Be a role model of accountability, responsibility, and respect. Always remember that your children are watching, and they can follow your actions quickly more than you can imagine. When you "get away with" speeding, or talk rudely to others, your children will notice. If you want your kids to grow up as responsible and respectful individuals, show it to them first.

It is your job as parents to provide your kids with the lessons that will help them become well rounded adults. These are just three key parenting points that every parent should remember. If you want to know the rest, read about the Noel Swanson Review for effective parenting.

Read the most informative parenting tips by visiting our web site about the Good Child Guide ebook. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Katherine_E_Thompson

Positive Child Discipline - The Key Word Is Positive! By Paul R Donahue

Positive child discipline is a term that is really popular these days. It's popular for two important reasons. We'll discuss them, and the effects of each one on our children!

The first reason this is a popular topic is because many, many parents are having issues with their children. Regardless of the reasons for this, parents are searching for help. Many times this search leads them to the internet. Usually by the time they get to this point, they are, for the most part, coming to grips with the fact that the forms of child discipline that they usually use, just aren't working.

From this admission has come a search for something else that might work. The term positive child discipline satisfies the imagination because it refers to the problem of child discipline. At the same time, it has the word positive included in it which gives people the sense that it is going to solve the problem. So, on the surface at least, there are pretty good reasons to feel good about this term, which then, in turn, enables many folks to want to know more about it!

Though some of this is speculation, and some of it is fact, it is definitely true that more and more people are searching for some answers to their parenting woes. This leads us to the second reason that this term is so popular.

It is so popular because there are more and more research findings that show that positive reinforcement works, and yelling, screaming, intimidation, and punishments don't work. There is even research that has found that all the negative style types of parenting cause more than just emotional harm. Many believe now, that these negative forms of child discipline cause increased fear and stress in children. The effects of this are numerous, including:

1. Increased cortisol to the brain
2. Dis-orientation
3. Teenage delinquency
4. Sociopathic behaviors and tendencies

The dis-orientation causes most or all of the misbehavior that we get mad at, and yell at our children for. Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Which came first, our children's misbehavior, or our causing fear in them?

Whether you totally subscribe to this theory concerning cortisol or not, it does bring up some very compelling ideas. Doesn't it seem that our children are better off with positive child discipline, as opposed to all the numerous types of negative style parenting. Not to mention, there are sometimes other reasons children act up, including when they don't understand something, or when their basic needs aren't being met.

When we get so caught up in coming down on them, and yelling at them, and often criticizing them, we may lose sight of the fact that they are live, young human beings, who are still growing and maturing.

If you would like access to a near endless array of parenting resources, go to positive child discipline. There you can get the help you need, including free reports on how to get your child to listen, and how to stop misbehavior, defiance, and outbursts. There is also a special report on what foods will help as well. For more information about cortisol, and it's effects, go to positive child discipline! Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Paul_R_Donahue

Christian Parenting Advice - Co-Dependency With Teen Drug Abuse - Part One By Phill Longmire

After serving for over 10 years as a pastor I have to say that there is just as many dysfunctions and masks that we wear in the church as people do outside the church. I think we just learn to hide them better on Sunday Morning.

But what happens when we wear those masks and don't deal with the issues at hand, is that we find ourselves actually becoming and living as co-dependents to our teenagers. We find ourselves hiding and masking the dysfunction, hurts, pain, and embarrassment that comes with our teens wrong thinking and behaving.

I am not sure if you know this or not but co-dependency is actually a learned behavior. You can actually pass it down from one generation to another, constantly teaching those that you raise how to function and live in a co-dependent relationship.

When a parent lives in a co-dependent relationship with their teenager who is abusing drugs it not only affects both parents, but siblings as well. It has a destructive pattern that plays out throughout the entire house. It shows and allows those who are harming the family to live any way they want while pressing in on those who are not abusing drugs, over compensating on parenting so that they themselves do not go down the same path.  

Some examples of dysfunctional families with teenagers who are using drugs might not acknowledge that problems exist. The family will not talk about them or confront them. As a result, family members learn to repress emotions and disregard their own needs. They become "survivors."

What happens in parents and siblings who live with a teenager who abuses drugs is that they develop behaviors that help them deny, ignore, or avoid difficult emotions. The family detach themselves. They don't talk. They don't touch. They don't confront. They don't feel. They don't trust.

This places the family in a situation where they are no longer able to live the way God designed them but carry the masks they wear in public, into their private life. In other words we never can take off the masks even in our home, because we live as co-dependents among our children.

Phill Longmire has been helping parents over the last 11 years deal with their teenagers drug use. His website athttp://www.teenagedrugabuseonline.com/ offers advice to parents who are dealing with teens who are using drugs. Phill's report "Help...My Teen is Using Drugs" is jam packed with tips and techniques that will allow you to help your teen today begin the hard long road of recovery. You can learn more by visiting the web page and getting the report delivered to you immediately. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Phill_Longmire